13/07/2010How do I feel? I have no idea what to feel. I feel down, confused, about life, about wether I am doing the right or wrong things. I am constanting clashing with different people in my family - my partner, my children. I know I miss my little girl, but that's no excuse for this feeling I have. I should be happy....I'm going Manager for Dial A Driver in the next few months...a once in a lifetime opportunity for some - even me. I have never seen myself in a Manager position before. I just wish I was getting some support after all, but my partner says he's trying to adjust to it. What's there to adjust to? I don't really have a 'social' life as it is, so it's not like that's changing. I rarely go out. WE rarely go out, coz we have 5 kids and no one wants to babysit. So it's not like that's changing..kinda used to it. This is a change for me as well, becoming a Manager of something.
I should also be happy because my sister is coming up on Thursday. I haven't seen her in ages. Yeah we talk on facebook, but that's about it.
I should be happy - I have a partner who loves me, and kids who love me, but I'm finding it hard to love them in return...instead I am just yelling and going off at them <<-- Clashing with them. I don't feel happy about much anymore. Maybe it's another downward spiral I'm headin or something...who knows.
